This is not an ordinary love story; in fact it’s just a story about a different love. I need to share this with someone, because it’s very close to my heart, and something the people around me wouldn’t understand.
We met each other in the middle of the world. We came from two different parts of the world, and we were literally each other’s contradictions. You, with your gorgeous dark hair and cute Spanish accent, and me with my snow-white skin and blue eyes. The first time I saw you, you fascinated me. It was your positivity and the way you saw life as one big opportunity. You were older than me, but yet we were on the same wavelength. We were both far away from home; living in a foreign country, struggling with a new language and having the adventure of our lives.
As I got to know you, we turned out to be the same. We liked the same music, read the same blogs, quoted the same movies and I felt like I could finally be myself with someone. We would be together every day, and have long conversations at night. We would go shopping and spent hours in book shops just looking at books and talking. At parties you would always be my date and make sure that I got home safe. Even when some guys were being unpleasant around me, you would protect me and make it all good again. You told me how beautiful and perfect I was, and your adorable smile would always cheer me up.
When life got difficult, we would be there for each other, and it would all be alright. We would go out for coffee and make fun of our terrible Italian, and somehow we always managed. We went traveling together and you showed me the world. I found myself thinking about life and the future, something that had never crossed my mind before.
I realized that I cared a lot for you, more than I originally had planned. I have never laughed as much as I did with you. You made me feel like something special and I was proud to be with you. People around us would ask a billion questions and tell us, that we were a cute couple. I would just laugh and tell them, that we were just really close. After Christmas you started behaving differently. You told me that we had to talk about something important, but unfortunately I got seriously sick, so I didn’t see you for a long time. One evening we finally got together in a park and we sat down. You told me, that you had wanted to tell me something for a long time, but we haven’t had the time. I don’t know what I had expected, but it came as a huge surprise, when you told me that you were homosexual. I was happy for you though and we talked a lot about it. It made us even closer and I supported you with all my heart; nothing had changed between us.
It wasn’t until one night, when I was talking to a friend, that I had some kind of revelation. My friend turned to me and said. “You know, he loves you very much, we can all see it”. And then it hit me. I loved him too, but not just as my best friend. I loved him so much more and there was no way something could ever happen between the two of us. I hadn’t realized it before, but now it was obvious. I didn’t say anything to her; I just smiled and changed the subject. I can never tell you this, mostly because I’m afraid of losing you. I don’t believe in soul mates, but I believe that you and I were determined to meet. You are the most amazing guy I have ever met and you will always mean the world to me.
Today we were discussing moments in life, instants that you remember being supremely happy during. You claimed that your top five best life moments are sports related. Watching your team win the World Series or Superbowl. I replied that I thought that was a little sad, that when you step away from those moments you actually have nothing to do with them. You agreed in principle, but then claimed that life doesn’t actually occur in instants like that. You can like your friends and family, you can have unbelievably happy nights, but there aren’t real moments in life like there are in sports, you argued. This conversation was several hours ago, and I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it since. I think there are instants like that in life, and all of mine were with you. Here’s my list of five happiest moments in life:
1. The first time we kissed after a year of being apart. It felt so comfortable and magnetic, like we needed to stay like that forever.
2. The moment I realized I love you. You had just gotten back from a month long trip that you cut short because you missed me. I was sitting crossed legged on your bed wearing your silly fleece hat and watching you unpack. I realized that I physically couldn’t stop grinning. I was so ecstatically happy.
3. The first time you blew on the back of my neck and realized that it made me giggle.
4. The time we lay in your bed and watched the thunderstorm through your skylight, and you reached over and held my hand.
5. The time you revealed your biggest secret to me, and I realized that you’d never told anyone before. You really did trust me.
Maybe, now, it’s time to move on. We don’t live in the same place anymore. You don’t even think about me when you think about the happiest times of your life. Instead, you’re thinking about the year the Rams were the best show on turf. I know I’ll always love you, but maybe it’s time for me to learn how to love other people as well. I want to be with someone that has the confidence to tell me he loves me. You and I have never been in that place at the same time.
So the dress choices from the Met Gala are beyond a mixed bag.
Some shined, others looked really predictable, and some just looked a wee bit special (and not in a good way.)
That said, a common thread is the dark lip, and Im slightly addicted.